English is a hard language to learn

Huge

Holla if you hear me!
Staff member
English is a hard language to learn:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France.

We find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?

One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

Your house can burn up as it burns down, you fill in a form by filling it out and an alarm goes off by going on.

When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"

Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
and one they missed.....

Why do we drive on a PARKWAY, and park in a DRIVEWAY?

Does this keep anyone awake at night? ;)
 

Q

stepmosnter
Staff member
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

Junk :D
 

Gonzo

Infinitesimally Outrageous
Staff member
Bew-ick

How come nobody gives a shit yet in the bathroom we take a shit???
 

Nixy

Administrator
Staff member
Yeah, English is nuts! It's one of the most complicated languages that uses our alphabet yet it's th einternational language! Go figure!
 

Inkara1

New Member
Nix, that's because the British had complete domination in past centuries of the ocean trade lines, so the language of trade was English.
 

Nixy

Administrator
Staff member
yeah, I wasn't implying that it was because of how the language is structured or whatever. Someone could have changed it since then if they wanted.
 

a13antichrist

Moderator from Hell
Professur said:
IF something is impossible it's not possible
If something is imflammable it burns.

Well "imflammable" is not a word. It's "inflammable".

And English is not innately any more difficult than any other language. It has rules of grammar, pronunciation, spelling, etc, just like every other language.

It just has more exceptions. :p

And in any case, it's the fact that our vowels have totally different qualities than most other Western languages that causes the most problems for foreign speakers - the irregularities in word construction and meaning are for the most part simply more chances for English-speakers to prove how incompetent they are.
 
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